Showing posts with label personal development. Show all posts
Showing posts with label personal development. Show all posts
Book Coming Out Soon
This blog was birth as a result of the book that I was writing and I am thrilled to announce that it is coming out very soon. The final corrections and editing are being put in place at the time of this posting and soon it will be sent off to be printed and published. Very exciting!
If you would like to participate in the promotional launch of my book “Anatomy of frustration - Discover How to Transform Frustration into Opportunities & Unlock the Power to Succeed” please do drop me a word or two at anatomyoffrustration at gmail dot com.
Looking forward to hearing from you.
If you would like to participate in the promotional launch of my book “Anatomy of frustration - Discover How to Transform Frustration into Opportunities & Unlock the Power to Succeed” please do drop me a word or two at anatomyoffrustration at gmail dot com.
Looking forward to hearing from you.
Anatomy of Frustration: Lack of skills or training
“All of the top achievers I know are life-long learners... Looking for new skills, insights, and ideas. If they're not learning, they're not growing... not moving toward excellence.” Denis Waitley
Sometimes frustration comes from attempting a task that is beyond our training and experience. This occurrence is common because our world is changing so rapidly. The way we are use to doing things are becoming obsolete, paradigms are shifting at an astronomical pace that most individuals in personal and professional environments are finding it daunting to stay abreast with the changing trends and this oftentimes result to tremendous stress and frustration.
In our evolving world the skills and training such as communication, leadership and people skills that were relevant to a particular task yesterday could be obsolete today. This has brought untold frustration to many people. For example the advent of the Internet has change the way we communicate and conduct business in the past. So we are faced with the challenge of attempting a task within a global environment that necessitate new skills and trainings, this often brings frustration to those involved, as they have to acquire new skills and new relevant information as they have to adapt to the changing trends.
Jim Rohn remarked, “Formal education will make you a living; self-education will make you a fortune.” The truth is formal education will only get you thus far but consistent life-long learning process (self-education) will help transform frustration, unlock the power to succeed and give you a competitive advantage in any enterprise.
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Jim Rohn remarked, “Formal education will make you a living; self-education will make you a fortune.” The truth is formal education will only get you thus far but consistent life-long learning process (self-education) will help transform frustration, unlock the power to succeed and give you a competitive advantage in any enterprise.
If you like this post then please consider subscribing to my full feed RSS. You can also subscribe by Email and have new posts sent directly to your inbox.
Why is Frustration spreading among Youths Today?
Why is frustration spreading among youths today? This is the question that I came across earlier on today as I was going through some of the keywords used by some of the visitors to my blog. I was deeply moved and stimulated by this question that I decided to write a post to at least give a response, which I think is very fundamental.
There are of course a number of reasons responsible for the untold frustrations among our youths today. One of the main reasons for the frustrations among youths is peer pressure. Most youths are trying so hard to be and act like somebody else. They are trying to fit into a certain group and while struggling to adopt a lifestyle in harmony with that group. Doing what is expected of the members of that particular group. Most youths have undying desire to attain a certain social status quo, and in this fruitless struggle they are getting stressed, agitated and frustrated.
The peer pressure exerted on the youths of today is unprecedented. The temptation to do what their peers are doing, which may not be congruent with their core values, is stressful. If you do not conform to these prescribed ways of life you will be considered as not happening or not in vogue. You are almost treated as an outcast for that matter and this is the most common cause of frustration amongst youths today.
One of the ways to address this problem is personal development. Find a mentor that can help you navigate through difficult decision-making process. Parents have a part to play as well in ensuring that youths are comfortable with themselves and they don’t have to be subjected to peer pressures to be successful and accepted in the society.
If you like this post then please consider subscribing to my full feed RSS. You can also subscribe by Email and have new posts sent directly to your inbox.
There are of course a number of reasons responsible for the untold frustrations among our youths today. One of the main reasons for the frustrations among youths is peer pressure. Most youths are trying so hard to be and act like somebody else. They are trying to fit into a certain group and while struggling to adopt a lifestyle in harmony with that group. Doing what is expected of the members of that particular group. Most youths have undying desire to attain a certain social status quo, and in this fruitless struggle they are getting stressed, agitated and frustrated.
The peer pressure exerted on the youths of today is unprecedented. The temptation to do what their peers are doing, which may not be congruent with their core values, is stressful. If you do not conform to these prescribed ways of life you will be considered as not happening or not in vogue. You are almost treated as an outcast for that matter and this is the most common cause of frustration amongst youths today.
One of the ways to address this problem is personal development. Find a mentor that can help you navigate through difficult decision-making process. Parents have a part to play as well in ensuring that youths are comfortable with themselves and they don’t have to be subjected to peer pressures to be successful and accepted in the society.
If you like this post then please consider subscribing to my full feed RSS. You can also subscribe by Email and have new posts sent directly to your inbox.
Anatomy of Frustration: Lack of Control
Lack of control over people, things, events and circumstances just to name a few is known to be one of the root causes of frustration today in personal and professional lives. Charles Popplestown stated, “You can not always control circumstances, but you can control your own thoughts.” This problem is quite common but not obvious. First and foremost you need to recognize that you have no control over things around you, control of other people’s lives or make anyone do anything for that matter.
Kelsey Grammer remarked, “The mark of a man is one who knows he can't control his circumstances - but he can control his responses.” A lot of people really get frustrated because they cannot control the situation to their own advantage. In view of the fact that there is a lack of control a feeling of disappointment, exasperation, or weariness takes over, producing anger, stress or resentment. These individuals do not realize that there are events, situations or circumstances in life that we cannot control just for the simple fact that we are humans.
Jim Rohn is often quoted as saying “It is the set of the sails, not the direction of the wind that determines which way we will go.” To be frustrated at the direction of the wind, which is beyond your control, is unproductive. It is imperative therefore, to understand that one may not be able to control certain situations or events because they do not depend on us directly or indirectly. You need to learn how to let go some of the things you are struggling with trying so hard to gain control over because when that happens that is when you gain.
Kelsey Grammer remarked, “The mark of a man is one who knows he can't control his circumstances - but he can control his responses.” A lot of people really get frustrated because they cannot control the situation to their own advantage. In view of the fact that there is a lack of control a feeling of disappointment, exasperation, or weariness takes over, producing anger, stress or resentment. These individuals do not realize that there are events, situations or circumstances in life that we cannot control just for the simple fact that we are humans.
Jim Rohn is often quoted as saying “It is the set of the sails, not the direction of the wind that determines which way we will go.” To be frustrated at the direction of the wind, which is beyond your control, is unproductive. It is imperative therefore, to understand that one may not be able to control certain situations or events because they do not depend on us directly or indirectly. You need to learn how to let go some of the things you are struggling with trying so hard to gain control over because when that happens that is when you gain.
If you like this post then please consider subscribing to my full feed RSS. You can also subscribe by Email and have new posts sent directly to your inbox.
Anatomy of Frustration: Lack of direction
Henry David Thoreau said, “If one advances confidently in the direction of one's dreams, and endeavors to live the life which one has imagined, one will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.” According to Jim Rohn, “You cannot change your destination overnight, but you can change your direction overnight.” You must have a clear road map in your head at every step of your task or assignment and where you are in the process. Lack of direction will lead to uncompleted or haphazardly completed tasks.
The dilemma is that without direction you will not know when you have arrived at your desired objectives and you will not be able to repeat the same process if you have to. The lack of direction and definition for “your” goals and objectives will certainly lead to frustration in the final analysis when meaningful results are not archieved. At home with your loved ones or at work with your colleagues you must define your objectives, what you intend to achieve in the relationship and how you intend to achieve it. Without these procedures there will be misunderstandings, indifference and ultimately frustration. Use these techniques before and after you embark on your task, as this will help you leverage all the resources at your disposal when frustrating circumstances occurs.
If you like this post then please consider subscribing to my full feed RSS. You can also subscribe by Email and have new posts sent directly to your inbox.
The dilemma is that without direction you will not know when you have arrived at your desired objectives and you will not be able to repeat the same process if you have to. The lack of direction and definition for “your” goals and objectives will certainly lead to frustration in the final analysis when meaningful results are not archieved. At home with your loved ones or at work with your colleagues you must define your objectives, what you intend to achieve in the relationship and how you intend to achieve it. Without these procedures there will be misunderstandings, indifference and ultimately frustration. Use these techniques before and after you embark on your task, as this will help you leverage all the resources at your disposal when frustrating circumstances occurs.
If you like this post then please consider subscribing to my full feed RSS. You can also subscribe by Email and have new posts sent directly to your inbox.
Richard Onebamoi interviewed by Mert Enkal
Anatomy of Frustration with Richard Onebamoi
Peopleized by: merkal2005 - Monday, 28 April 2008
merkal2005: Hi Richard, please tell us about yourself and your mission
Successfacilitator: Hello Mert, first and foremost let me take this opportunity to thank you very much for the interview.
Well, my name is Richard Onebamoi, I am a Pastor, International Speaker and Success facilitator. I'm also the President and Executive Facilitator of Success Empowerment Network. I am married to Catherine who co-pastor with me and she is the Associate Executive Facilitator of Success Empowerment Network. We are bless with four children and I reside in Brussels, Belgium in the heart of the European Union with my family.
My mission is to inspire your performance, expand your imagination, cultivate your dreams and to help you discover, develop, deploy and maximize your God-given potential.
merkal2005: When did you start blogging?
Successfacilitator: Good question. I believe my first blogging experience began in 2006 and actively towards the end of 2007.
merkal2005: In your blog you say one can easily transform frustration into opportunities. Please give us some tips.
Successfacilitator: To start with let us define frustration. Dictionary.com defines frustration has: A feeling of dissatisfaction, often accompanied by anxiety or depression, resulting from unfulfilled needs or unresolved problems.
Now, you must understand that frustration in life is inevitable, but can also be useful depending on how we respond to it. We can transform frustration into opportunities and unlock the power to succeed in any endeavor if we respond appropriately. The following are some tips on how to easily do that:
Quiet Time: Develop a habit of having quiet times. These are moments that you could step aside from all your activities as you begin to feel overwhelmed or frustrated.
Identify Root Cause(s) of Frustration: The law of cause and effect states that: “Everything happens for a reason.” For every effect in your life, there is a cause. Crises do not just erupt without causes. The perspective changes when you consider frustration as an effect with a cause or series of causes.
Valuable Learning Tool: You have to see the situation as a learning experience. With a positive attitude, belief in yourselves and faith in God, you will find yourself in a better situation and frame of mind. Instead of complaining and making yourself and everybody around you miserable ask a question like “how can I use this frustration to be a valuable learning tool”. Looking closely, there are always valuable lessons to be learned that will better prepare you down the road when other situation like it arises.
Eliminate The Obvious: What I mean by the obvious is anything or persons that serves as a positive catalyst for the attainment of your objectives. This is a strategy that I have used in helping individuals that are frustrated and do not know how to begin dealing with the challenges that affronts them. I begin by asking them to eliminate what is obvious to them in the whole scenario which serves them positively and when they have come through that exercise I then ask them now to put the other things that seems to serve their purpose or goals negatively into proper perspective and deal with them accordingly.
Change your expectations: Dr. John Maxwell stated that “We all deal with the impact of expectations in three dimensions; Expectations we have for ourselves, Expectations we have of others and Expectations others have of us.” Oftentimes these dimensions of expectation can be very frustrating if they are not realistic and crystal clear. In order to turn frustration into opportunities you have to clarify expectations in every dimension, and frequently revisit them to make adjustments or to realign your expectations to be congruent with your inner and external dynamics.
With these few tips you are on your way to transforming frustration and unlocking the power to succeed.
merkal2005: Does blogging give a second chance to frustrated people?
Successfacilitator: Oh yes it does. All you need to do is pull yourself together and connect with the right associations.
merkal2005: How do you see the future of blogging?
Successfacilitator: The future of blogging can't be expressed in my opinion in human vernacular. I must say however, that the future of blogging is very very promising to say the least.
merkal2005: What are your suggestions to new bloggers?
Successfacilitator: I know that at first time it could be very very overwhelming, with the information and the learning curves that you will have to go through and you will be frustrated very often but.... Simply Just Take It One Step At A Time.
Peopleized by: merkal2005 - Monday, 28 April 2008
 | Read Anatomy of Frustration with Richard Onebamoi and get inspired! |
merkal2005: Hi Richard, please tell us about yourself and your mission
Successfacilitator: Hello Mert, first and foremost let me take this opportunity to thank you very much for the interview.
Well, my name is Richard Onebamoi, I am a Pastor, International Speaker and Success facilitator. I'm also the President and Executive Facilitator of Success Empowerment Network. I am married to Catherine who co-pastor with me and she is the Associate Executive Facilitator of Success Empowerment Network. We are bless with four children and I reside in Brussels, Belgium in the heart of the European Union with my family.
My mission is to inspire your performance, expand your imagination, cultivate your dreams and to help you discover, develop, deploy and maximize your God-given potential.
merkal2005: When did you start blogging?
Successfacilitator: Good question. I believe my first blogging experience began in 2006 and actively towards the end of 2007.
merkal2005: In your blog you say one can easily transform frustration into opportunities. Please give us some tips.
Successfacilitator: To start with let us define frustration. Dictionary.com defines frustration has: A feeling of dissatisfaction, often accompanied by anxiety or depression, resulting from unfulfilled needs or unresolved problems.
Now, you must understand that frustration in life is inevitable, but can also be useful depending on how we respond to it. We can transform frustration into opportunities and unlock the power to succeed in any endeavor if we respond appropriately. The following are some tips on how to easily do that:
Quiet Time: Develop a habit of having quiet times. These are moments that you could step aside from all your activities as you begin to feel overwhelmed or frustrated.
Identify Root Cause(s) of Frustration: The law of cause and effect states that: “Everything happens for a reason.” For every effect in your life, there is a cause. Crises do not just erupt without causes. The perspective changes when you consider frustration as an effect with a cause or series of causes.
Valuable Learning Tool: You have to see the situation as a learning experience. With a positive attitude, belief in yourselves and faith in God, you will find yourself in a better situation and frame of mind. Instead of complaining and making yourself and everybody around you miserable ask a question like “how can I use this frustration to be a valuable learning tool”. Looking closely, there are always valuable lessons to be learned that will better prepare you down the road when other situation like it arises.
Eliminate The Obvious: What I mean by the obvious is anything or persons that serves as a positive catalyst for the attainment of your objectives. This is a strategy that I have used in helping individuals that are frustrated and do not know how to begin dealing with the challenges that affronts them. I begin by asking them to eliminate what is obvious to them in the whole scenario which serves them positively and when they have come through that exercise I then ask them now to put the other things that seems to serve their purpose or goals negatively into proper perspective and deal with them accordingly.
Change your expectations: Dr. John Maxwell stated that “We all deal with the impact of expectations in three dimensions; Expectations we have for ourselves, Expectations we have of others and Expectations others have of us.” Oftentimes these dimensions of expectation can be very frustrating if they are not realistic and crystal clear. In order to turn frustration into opportunities you have to clarify expectations in every dimension, and frequently revisit them to make adjustments or to realign your expectations to be congruent with your inner and external dynamics.
With these few tips you are on your way to transforming frustration and unlocking the power to succeed.
merkal2005: Does blogging give a second chance to frustrated people?
Successfacilitator: Oh yes it does. All you need to do is pull yourself together and connect with the right associations.
merkal2005: How do you see the future of blogging?
Successfacilitator: The future of blogging can't be expressed in my opinion in human vernacular. I must say however, that the future of blogging is very very promising to say the least.
merkal2005: What are your suggestions to new bloggers?
Successfacilitator: I know that at first time it could be very very overwhelming, with the information and the learning curves that you will have to go through and you will be frustrated very often but.... Simply Just Take It One Step At A Time.
| Successfacilitator's Page: www.anatomy-of-frustration.blogspot.com | Authors Page: merkal2005 |
Anatomy of Frustration: Unfulfilled Expectations:
Unfulfilled expectations are often the root cause(s) of numerous frustrations either in your personal or professional life. Most people that I know have one or more personal or professional expectations at any given time from their goals, projects, people, spouse or relationships and when these expectations are unmet or unfulfilled, frustrations, anger, disappointments and rage are often the unwanted results and these of course fuels the frustration. For instance, when you have set family, business or career goals or targets for yourself to be achieved within a time frame and you are unable not to achieve these goals and or not been able to meet the dead line, this often result to untold frustration, anger and disappointments to say the least.
You have expectations from your spouse, your boss, and colleagues at work, your friends and acquaintances. Now when these expectations are unmet and frustration arises which most likely will, what you must do is to step back and re-evaluate your expectations and make adjustment where necessary. Solicit for feedbacks so as to ascertain what is and isn’t working. Focus on your expectations and not on the frustration and disappointments. Sometimes you will have to communicate your expectations to those that are part of making it come to fruition. It is said that you cannot keep doing the same thing over and over again expecting a different result. You may have to change your procedures or action plan that will produce the anticipated expectation. My final thought is very crucial you have to stay the course, do not allow frustration deny you of your birthright, don’t give up, don’t give in.
You have expectations from your spouse, your boss, and colleagues at work, your friends and acquaintances. Now when these expectations are unmet and frustration arises which most likely will, what you must do is to step back and re-evaluate your expectations and make adjustment where necessary. Solicit for feedbacks so as to ascertain what is and isn’t working. Focus on your expectations and not on the frustration and disappointments. Sometimes you will have to communicate your expectations to those that are part of making it come to fruition. It is said that you cannot keep doing the same thing over and over again expecting a different result. You may have to change your procedures or action plan that will produce the anticipated expectation. My final thought is very crucial you have to stay the course, do not allow frustration deny you of your birthright, don’t give up, don’t give in.
Anatomy of Frustration: Empowering or Disempowering?
Our world today has become highly competitive and technologically advancing at an astronomical pace, which has led to a situation where most people sets goals and targets to be achieved within a time frame if they must stay relevant to trends of the times. Now the dilemma is whenever these goals and targets are not achieved frustration sets in. These goals and targets could be personal or professional in nature. However, whatever they are the issue at stake here is the fact that the objectives were not met. The feeling of frustration can affect the mind in such a way that it could be empowering or disempowering depending on the line of action pursued or questions asked in the process. Your thinking prowess will be hindered gravely, if the individual’s perspective is negative. Having the right perspective is one of the denominators that can help translate your frustration into opportunities and the power to succeed in any enterprise.
Quote Meal
“Frustration, although quite painful at times, is a very positive and essential part of success.”
Bo Bennett
Anatomy of Frustration: Positive Possibilities
There are limitless positive possibilities, advantages to which you can use and turn the energy of this emotional trauma. Here is what Ralp Marston said, “You've done it before and you can do it now. See the positive possibilities. Redirect the substantial energy of your frustration and turn it into positive, effective, unstoppable determination.” This cannot be further from the truth. All you need to do is to decide, yes to decide that you will become unstoppable and determined to harness the energy of frustration transforming it into extraordinary opportunities and unlocking the power to succeed.
Anatomy of Frustration: Frustration can be a useful tool.
Frustration in life is not only inevitable, but also useful. However, what you chose to do or don't in moments of frustration is what will determine your ability to do that, which is necessary to achieve the expected end, or desired and your inability to produce your desired outcome. It is not what you go through that ultimately determine your outcome but how you respond to the events responsible for the frustration. Jack Canfield has formulated a formula that I think drives this point home and that is, Events + Response= Outcome (E+R=O). If you do not appreciate the outcome such as frustration in your life all you need to do is to change your response to the event until you get your anticipated outcome.
Quote Meal
“I've come to believe that all my past failure and frustration were actually laying the foundation for the understandings that have created the new level of living I now enjoy.”
Anthony Robbins
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